Some of the people who read this blog may or may not know about my recent challenge/struggle to get sober.

While I wasn’t living under a bridge or holding a cardboard sign on a corner asking for money, I had developed a lifestyle that involved way too much alcohol. And while alcohol was something I had always enjoyed socially in my life, from the age of 16 until 43, I recently decided that there was no longer a place for alcohol in my life.

So, I did the only thing I knew how to do, and that was to get help from the best source that I could find to rid myself of alcohol. As of today, I’m 37 days into a new chapter of life that is alcohol-free.

If some people reading this have their mouths’ on the ground, it’s okay. I’m still me. I’m still as tenacious, power-driven, and crazy as I’ve ever been. But now I simply get to do it without any substance occupying my life. And I’ve got to tell you, the start of this new chapter has been almost magical.

They talk in sobriety about a pink cloud. A pink cloud is the state of mind where you always feel good and you always feel free, and you always feel away from all of the bad feelings and things that occupied your mind. But now, as I continue day after day through this journey, I truly can tell you it is a magical state of being.

It’s magical to feel as good as I feel. It’s magical to not have stress upon stress piled up in my life. It’s magical to see things from a clearer, broader perspective. And that perspective for me is being rid of alcohol.

So, as I come to a close with this, my point is very simple. Do what a very wise person once told me, and that is, take the one thing in your life that is causing you to not be successful and get rid of it. Get rid of it, and get rid of it for good.

Maybe it’s because it’s the first of the year. Maybe it’s because it seems more busy than normal. But I found myself in a meeting today with a very old phrase that came back to me.
And that is: “The only thing constant is change.”

Change is everywhere you go. I’m watching my kids change right before my very eyes. My 11-year-old now wears makeup, talks about Taylor Swift, and spends hours a day with skincare products.

My nine-year-old, all she cares about is dancing (she also loves Taylor Swift). I think she likes boys or has a crush on boys and is growing up right before my very eyes.

My eight-year-old son is so ready to shoot a deer this year that he can’t even stand it. Watching him from a few years ago, when he barely even understood what going hunting was to where he has come now, it’s just been transformational.

And my five-year-old son now has a dirt bike. Even though it has training wheels, it is still a dirt bike, but he is learning to ride.

These are just some personal examples of change. But I see change everywhere in business. People who love you one minute might not love you the next. People who you’ve never met before put you on a pedestal and entrust you to take them forward.

It’s funny how things change in such a short amount of time. If change is the only constant, I wonder why so many people have such a hard time adapting to change. I guess it’s the luck of what I do and the ability I’ve had.

I’m used to change. I know stuff’s going to change every day. But with change comes responsibility. You have to be responsible, knowing that things are going to change and being responsible to change them quickly enough, but not just change things for the sake of change.

My advice to anybody as they go through the beginning part of the year and set their course on 2024 is this: Know that change is coming. Know that there’s going to be a lot of change. Know that things in your personal life, as well as your work life, are definitely going to change, and you will be ready for a great year.

Sometimes, you get so caught up trying to do things that you think you need to do and should do, and you’re wasting time because you’re not focused on doing things that you can do.

I had a recent example of this in my career, in my work life, where we were wasting a lot of time on some business that was big business, but we were going nowhere with it. It was taking us nowhere. It was problematic. It was just not fit for what we do and who we are. And I said goodbye to it today. Because I have so much new business and big opportunities on the horizon. Things I’ve never even dreamed or thought about in my career are now coming to the forefront as we speak.

So my point of this is: don’t waste time on smaller stuff than you’re capable of. Go after and set your sights on things that are so big, so opportunistic, so incredible, that you just never even know the opportunities that you’re missing because you’re wasting time on countless small, minute, problematic things. Don’t waste time in your work life and don’t waste time in your personal life. It’s a two-fold component. Don’t waste time on your phone when you’re sitting there with your kids. Don’t waste time watching sports with your friends, rather than having real, deep conversations about how life is going. Don’t waste time mindlessly doing tasks when you could be doing things that you really enjoy.

“Don’t waste time” is a really critical thing in how you live and how you work. And it dawned on me today that I had wasted some time, and I need to focus on things so far greater, so far bigger that it’s just amazing.

I see this all the time. In fact, it’s probably the number one reason I don’t like going on LinkedIn. People boasting and the animated confetti accompanied by, “Happy to announce I’ve started a new position at….”

If you look at the person’s profile, you can see how many times over the last decade or so they’ve posted about how many new positions they’ve had. Well, I have a statement I’d like to make. I’m happy to announce I started a new position at… “I will continue working my ass off for the next 20 years, just as I have done for the last 20 years.”

I think people today really don’t understand how to view their careers. They look at jobs, not careers. They look at bosses, not mentors. They look at opportunities in a different way, meaning, “What’s in it for me?”

While it is a “What’s in it for me?” society, there has to be a component of your career or your job where you’re giving to the company or the entity that is providing for you. This isn’t a high and mighty speech. But it’s a point I’m trying to make about hoping people start to look at their careers differently than just hopping from job to job.

I’m happy to announce I’m starting a new position at “I will continue working as hard for the people who work with me as I always have.”

I’m happy to announce I’m starting a new position at “I will continue delivering for my clients the same excellent level of service that I have always delivered for them.”

I’m happy to announce I’m starting a new position as a better father, a better husband, and someone who makes an effort to improve every day.

I’m happy to announce… I’m just happy to announce. I hope everybody reads this and gets a little bit of humor and a little bit of reprieve from LinkedIn and being happy to announce their new position.

Everywhere I look, I see people talking about all the bad in the world.

The wars in Ukraine and Israel, the rising price of food, inflation, interest rates, and a looming stock market crash – these factors keep some people so hung up that they can’t see past them to realize that everything is actually pretty good. And no matter what you may say or fear, you really have no control over these things.

I deal with this mindset day-to-day. Some people want to make every excuse in the world for why they shouldn’t advertise: the fear, the worry, the UAW strike, the concern over a potential vehicle shortage. I think people can manufacture any reason in their minds as to why things aren’t going to be good.

Sometimes I may be too much of an optimist, but I’ve always believed that attitude is everything. It’s reached a point where it almost bothers me when people talk about all the bad and the perceived bad things that are about to happen again.

Regardless of what you think or say, you don’t really have any control over wars, interest rates, inflation, the economy, or the stock market. So why let it bother you? More importantly, why let it create a negative mental space?

I think some people just really love bad news so much that they want to spout it out and scare everyone else. I’m not a big believer in this. In both my career and life, I’ve learned that there’s a way to conquer and overcome any obstacle that comes your way. If you believe that, you can enjoy your days much more than if you sit around worrying about everything.

I’m writing this note from seat 4D on a United Airlines flight from Birmingham to Boise, Idaho. I’m so giddy with excitement as I travel to a new part of the country to try and earn a little more new business. You see, I’ve been to Boise, Idaho many times to ski with a longtime friend who has a house in the Idaho mountains, but I’ve never been out here for work. It’s a new space and part of the country that I’m very excited about, with endless opportunities. The best part is that I feel really good about the plan I’m taking out to present. Our team has really built a masterpiece for a big dealer group that’s so common-sense-based, it’s going to be a fun presentation.

Everything feels like it came out as it should. I’ve put the right people in the right seats and now have time to go and expand into new areas. Yes, that means a lot more on the West Coast and Mountain States, which I’ve never really tried to dominate simply because of a lack of time in my schedule. But now I have a mission and a purpose, plus I love snowboarding and wine country, so having a work reason to come out here doesn’t suck either.

It will mean more time away from home, which I don’t always love, but hopefully my absence will teach my children that what you want in life, you have to work like hell to get. The sacrifice isn’t easy, but then again, getting to do what I do best is very fulfilling.

A while back, a really good friend of mine who’s a very successful car dealer told me a story about confidence.

He was talking about people like him, people like myself, and that we’re really not the smartest people. We’re really not the most innovative thinkers. We’re really not the people who have created anything that’s going to change the world. But the difference between us versus most people was confidence.

It’s having confidence in your decisions. It’s having confidence in your daily life. It’s having confidence simply to do anything that you’re trying to do. A lot of people overthink things in their life. They overthink things about their career. They overthink personal situations. They overthink day-to-day responsibilities. But sometimes simplifying something down to the simplest form and having confidence is all you need.

People can smell confidence – whether you have it or don’t have it – from a mile away. People learn how to read people who are confident. You have to be careful with confidence so it does not come across as arrogant, egotistical, or like you’re just trying to brag, but having confidence and knowing the confidence you have in yourself is the real difference-maker for a lot of people.

I was very glad I had this conversation with my friend a year ago because it totally changed my perspective on how I talk to people and deal with people who are trying to build up their confidence.

Confidence can be lost, but once you understand confidence, it’s something that you can never have taken away from you. You may have good days. You may have bad days, but having confidence in yourself is the greatest gift of all.

I read a stat years ago that talked about airplane pilots and the time they spent flying. It said that if you spent 1,500 hours doing the task of flying a plane and you became good at it, then if you spent 3,000 hours at the task of flying a plane, you became great at it. And if you spent over 5,000 hours flying a plane, you were considered an expert pilot.

As I thought about that stat today, I thought about a phrase: “Just keep at it.” Everything doesn’t go your way every day. Some days are better than others, some weeks are better than others, some months are better than others. But if you have a commitment to yourself and you have a mindset that you’re never going to quit, that you’re just going to keep at it, then at some point you’re going to become great at what you do. At some point, you’re going to become an expert. And then at the final point, you’re going to become a master.

I thought about that today as a parallel to my career. I don’t think I’m a master at anything. I really just think I’m a lucky son of a bitch who’s found a lot of good people to work around for a really long time.

But what I think it reminds me is this: you just have to keep at it. This isn’t a never give up, never quit, never die type of post. It’s about getting your mindset tuned to being consistent. Always trying to go beyond. Always trying to do better. Always trying to improve what you do and how you do it every day. And I think if you do that – whether it’s 1,500 hours in the cockpit of an airplane, 3,000 hours behind a desk in an office, or 5,000 hours out in front of clients – then at some point you’re going to master the art of all the things you get to accomplish in life.

I think being a master at something is going to give anyone a great sense of accomplishment.

Henry Ford said, “Whether you think you can or think you can’t, you are right either way.”  Maybe because I spent some time in my Ford dealership this week and was faced with challenges and obstacles, I found myself going straight to a negative place.

Entering into a whole new type of business with unknown areas to look at and inspect, you see an entirely different set of issues than the ones I have grown accustomed to in my other business.

But as you look at every issue, you have to address it with a can-do attitude. For a minute, I found myself thinking that there was no way to win. That these things were going to engulf me like some kind of wildfire. But after taking a step back each time and remembering what brought me there, I flipped the narrative in my mind to a can-do attitude.

This is something ingrained in each of us from some of our earliest memories.  The book “The Little Engine That Could” – I vividly remember being read to me by my mother, and the lines “I think I can, I think I can, I think I can.” It was a cool story when you were three, but it has a payoff and a life lesson now at 43 that is something I just can’t help but smile about.

Each day throws us challenges and situations that we think we will never get over and never get past.  But when you get served with these each day, go back and channel your inner 3-year-old self and just remember “The Little Engine That Could.”  Because after all, whether you think you can or think you can’t, you are right either way.

It never ceases to amaze me what can happen in your life. In a single day, you can see so many emotions coming from so many different directions. This isn’t because of any one situation or recent action, but while traveling for the last six days I have had an enormous amount of time to reflect on all the life events that can happen – many of which occur in a single day.

Let me unpack just a few of the feelings brought on by some of these life events:

Life events bring enormous joy and appreciation

Life events bring success and a sense of victory

Life events bring anger and frustration

Life events bring fatigue and exhaustion

Life events bring sadness and mental turmoil

Life events bring friendship and respect

Life events bring sorrow and anxiety

Life events bring thrill and jubilation

Life events bring failure and fear

Life events bring peace and freedom

These are just some of the feelings that I know I go through on certain days, and I have felt all of them over the course of this week. No, I’m not close to having a breakdown, but quite the opposite. I have a renewed sense of peace and confidence in my life gained by simply watching all these feelings flow in and out of my day.

I just wanted to share these in case anyone else is having some or all of these feelings. My message is it will all be okay. Just keep enjoying life.